25 March 2011

Motherhood.

We've been very, VERY busy lately. And I love it. Sure, there are days when I don't want to do anything, but now I totally get it when other stay at home moms always have something going on and have to 'pencil' me in weeks in advance. I get it!! More on all we've been doing later. For now, I have to get this out.

So, I was talking with someone today and she asked me what I do when I'm not 'playing Mom'. And in my head I'm all, 'WHAAAAAAAAT?!?!'  I know she meant well, which is why I didn't say anything to her. But, the more I thought about it, the more it bothered me. I responded with, 'I don't really do much of anything. I'm always with my girls.' And then she gave me a sad face, like woe is me. And I am not 'playing Mom'. I AM Mom. That's me. They define me. And I am completely okay with that. This is the life I chose and this is the life I want.

She doesn't have kids, so she doesn't get it. But, in all honesty, these girls are my LIFE. I get out of bed FOR them. Because of them. Makayla and Addison are why I do what I do every single day. I wouldn't have my life any other way.

Then after she said that, she said something along the lines of, 'You know, when you can pawn them off on Adam and get out for a couple hours.' Okay, I understand that moms need a break. I totally get that. There are definitely days where I feel like I'm going to punch the wall, but in the end, I know what matters. And it's my family. Getting out isn't a priority to me. Yes, I love to go out with my friends and go on dates with my husband, but my life is here. And those two precious girls. They are my heart and wherever they are, is where I want to be.

With all that being said, I do have things I like to do. I love to read, I love to take pictures, I love to sew, I love to watch movies and some tv shows. There are things I like to do.

Maybe my life isn't glamorous and maybe people that don't have their own children don't get it. But this is my life. And my girls are my heart. They are 'what I do'. They're it. I pour my life and my soul into them so that they can become better women than I will ever be. I teach them life skills every day. I tell them about Jesus and how much He loves them. I support them when they're are learning new things. I show them everything they need to know.

Yeah, I like a break sometimes, but that's not why God gave me these two blessings. He gave them to me to raise them up. Yeah, I get frustrated and I let my anger get the best of me sometimes, but that doesn't ever stop me from loving them.

Makayla and Addison, you are my everything. I will do anything for you. I have never 'played Mom' with you and I never will. I am your Mommy and I always will be.

And I don't want it any other way.

5 comments:

The Hohs said...

I wish you knew the day I had today. This is what I needed to hear! Can I get a WOOT for Mamas who want to punch walls some days but in the end, who cares? These girls are my flippin' life! I wish I didn't get so mad sometimes. I wish I didn't get so stressed and frustrated over little things. I get irritated hanging out with people who don't have kids. They just don't get it. My girls are my world. No matter how much I get stressed, I will always have this undying love for them!

Sleeping Beauty said...

Dude really?! "Playing mom." Um no. YOU are a mom. That IS the life Jesus called you to and blessed you with. I am encouraged by your ability to look beyond that kind of LOUD ignorance. You are a great mom! And who wants to "pawn" their kids off???? Ridiculous!

Laurie J said...

Mommyhood--it's all in, or all in, isn't it?! ;) You sound like a great mama!
<3

Elissa said...

Yeah I would have to agree that was pretty rude. When you are a Mom its what you do, 24/7! Breaks are nice and all but the kids are everything and why we were blessed with them to begin with!

Ashley Ping said...

Thank you for posting this Lindsay! It is nice to know that there is someone else out there who admits that their children are their life. A lot of people make me feel like there is something wrong with me because Emma is my life and being a mommy is what defines me. But like some women have dreamed their whole life of being a doctor, nurse, lawyer, whatever, I have dreamed of being a great mommy. I feel completely blessed that God has blessed me with being a Mommy and I want to give it my all, not just part of me!