12 November 2010

Cherishing These Moments

I will never forget how my girls look when they sleep.

I probably haven't seen Makayla sleeping in over two months, but I can still picture what she looks like right now in her crib. Her roly-poly belly is sticking out from under her shirt (with her rash on the right side, that just won't quit {she calls it her scratchies}), laying on her back, hair strewn all over her angelic face, stuffed animals and blankets everywhere. Sigh. I miss that adorable sight. But ever since we've moved from Cali, she won't let us keep her door cracked and there's no going in there now, because we'd make too much noise.

Adam and I used to sneak in M's room every night before we went to bed to look at her. She'd be in the craziest positions almost every night. One time she was sleeping like a little baby (back in the day, of course) on her belly, legs tucked under her, with her feet sticking out under her booty in the air. I totally cried. It was beautiful. Another time, her foot was sticking out of one of her crib slats. I fixed it, of course. And then another time we went in and she was snoring up a storm. We had to try so hard not to laugh.

Seeing Addison asleep takes me back in time. Well everything that sweet girl does takes me back in time. It's like looking at Makayla at that very age. Can I tell you a secret? I really love getting up in the middle of the night with Addison. I loved it with M, too (in the later months...). It's such a tender time...just Mommy and baby. Recently when I burp Addison, instead of getting up and standing next to her crib, like I used to do, I sit in the chair and rock her for a while before I put her down. These are moments I'll never get back.

My girls are growing up and there's no stopping it. No matter how much I want to. It breaks my heart, but makes me so happy at the same time. I love watching Makayla grow up. She is so compassionate and so very, very observant. She notices the tiniest things ever. Like she knows that my mom drinks coffee all the time. She always looks at my mom's earrings and she remembers the colors of pretty much anything. She knows all different types of animals (like emperor penguin, tree frog, kawati, kinkajou, just to name a few) and just on Wednesday, she said her ABCs from start to finish, with no mess ups, for the first time ever!! I didn't even know she knew her ABCs. She can name {almost} ever letter and she counts {almost} flawlessly from 1 to 20. I could not be more proud of my baby girl. Also the other night, while Adam was gone (he was gone for work for a few days), I had to go feed Addi, so M was watching tv and I turned to her and said, 'I love you' and she said, 'I love you, too.' I totally cried. It just melts my heart at how sweet she is.

Addison rolls over all the time. Like constantly. Then she gets really pissed when she's on her belly and I always have to come rescue her. I remember the same thing happening to M at this age. :) She always smiles when she sees me, which I freaking love. She still wakes up 2-3 times a night and like I said, I'm okay with that. So now when she wakes up, I feed her and then rock her for a while, while she sleeps on my shoulder. She normally falls asleep when I feed her before bedtime and then it's smooth sailing after that. Tonight, after I was done feeding her, she was still awake, so I burped her and she had her head up, looking around and then all of a sudden, she just laid her head on my shoulder. It was so sweet.

I love seeing how my girls love me. And I don't even think they know how much it means to me. I also love seeing how much they love each other. Any time and I mean ANY TIME Makayla is around, Addison has THE biggest smile on her sweet face. It is so precious. Every morning, Makayla wants to see 'her' baby. She always gets so excited to go in Addi's room to get her up from her naps. Tonight we were playing with Addison on the floor and Makayla was trying to move Addi's hand out of her mouth and I told her not to (she tends to make Addi stop a lot of stuff) and M said, 'But I want to give her a hug.' Swoon! How did I get so lucky?

It's so weird and amazing and wonderful to watch Makayla grow up. I can't believe she's going to be 3 in less than 2 months. It still blows my mind. She talks in complete sentences, which she's been doing for a while, but now it's like she's throwing in more words than she used to. That probably doesn't make sense, so here's an example. When we took her trick or treating, she was walking and she said, "Daddy, can you get the hair out of my face?" Normally, she probably would have said, "Get da hair outta my face." or something along those lines. I was floored. And like I said, it probably doesn't sound that big to you, but I just couldn't believe that she was growing up. She's just so big, it slays me.

I'm sure there are a million more things that I want to remember about this time, right now, in my girls' lives and our life together, but I just can't. It's impossible to write it all down. Impossible to remember every single little thing. Like this one that I wanted to write before: After I put Addi down, when she wakes up in the middle of the night or when I put her down for bed and she's asleep, I stand there and watch her sleep for a little bit. I never could have done that with M at this age. Because she would wake up as soon as her body hit that crib mattress. It's so beautiful to me to see her laying so peacefully, one arm out of her swaddle, totally relaxed, full belly and content.

There is nothing more precious than a sleeping baby. Okay, maybe one thing. My sleeping babies.