It really does fly by, doesn't it?
I can't believe Addison is almost four months old. Really! How did that happen so fast?
And Makayla will be three years old in 2 1/2 months?! Oh. my. gosh.
I love my daughters more than I ever thought I could love someone. They are my everything.
There are days that pass me by where I feel like I am not present enough for them. I look at Makayla playing with her Barbies (I know, right?!) and I just feel like I don't always soak up every moment like I should. I look at Addison while I'm feeding her and wonder if I take advantage of every feeding.
Do I relish in every moment that I have with my precious girls? I know the answer is no. I get on the computer far too often when they're awake and some days, I even count the minutes until nap time. Does that make me a bad mom? I sure hope not! Sometimes I feel like it does, but I know my girls feel loved and I know they love me.
I know in my heart I have more to give to them. I need to play Barbies more, lay on the floor while Addison has tummy time more, enjoy making lunch for my almost three year old more and enjoy those tender moments where I breastfeed my sweet baby and she falls asleep oh so sweetly.
I will miss these moments. My girls are already growing up way too fast. When Makayla was a baby, all I wished for was for her to be this age, that she is right now. And now that Addison is already four months old, I am wishing for time to slow down. I can never get those moments back with Makayla. And I'll never be able to get these moments back with Addison. It pains me so much to know how quickly I wished away Makayla's babyhood. If only I could go back and do it all over again with her. I would enjoy her more. I would spend more time just being and stop worrying about meaningless things, like dishes and laundry. Yes, I know dishes and laundry still need to get done, but they can wait until after the kids are in bed. My house does not need to be spotless. I have children and guess what? They live in my house. And guess what else? I'm proud of them.
I now have tears streaming down my face.
I might not be able to get Makayla's babyhood back, but I can enjoy her to the fullest at this point in her life.
I love my girls more than they will probably ever know.
These time are precious. Hold onto them and don't wish them away. Take that extra minute at bed time to give another kiss, to scratch her back. She just wants you. So be there. Read another bed time story. So what if you have a tv show that starts at 8? Tv shows are not what matters in life. Your kids do. So show them. Stop rushing them to get out the door so fast. Take time to just be. Be with each other as a family. Enjoy each other and enjoy your life together. Enjoy every single moment. Because this bed time tonight? You'll never get it back. So relish in it. Don't try to get out of it because it's mundane. Your kids will remember the special times they had with you, not how clean your house was. Enjoy your kids. Soak them in.
From this day forward, I will live each day with no regrets. I will live in every moment. I will be present in every event that happens in my daughters' lives. I will relish everything and I will no longer look back.